You’ve got to put everything in a clear plastic bag. Ta da! The NFL have banned rucksacks and handbags from the stadium. My previous blogpost (reposted from Coach Misti) argues that this is a woman-hating initiative, however I’m going to try and sit on the fence because I do mostly agree with her on this one.
Now my old company was a plastic bag manufacturer so I didn’t mind because everything was plastic bags anyway. I was using pink French plastic bags in the bin in the bathroom and big woven ones to throw all my clothes in when I moved house those four times. For the last six years plastic bags were great! Now I’m not there anymore maybe my real feelings can come out.
Anyway, men sometimes have it so lucky – I remember going to clubs when I was at uni and stressing about what bag to take, is it big enough, does it go with what I’m wearing, will it get yonked off my shoulder by some mad student thief? Then what else do I need to take, little money holder or big jabba normal everyday purse with all my cards in, do I need an umbrella, is it strong enough to hold my jacket if there’s dancing but I don’t want to pay for the cloakroom? While the boys in our block just shoved their phone, keys and wallet in their pocket and they’re good to go.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t leave the house with a suitcase but I like to be prepared.
- Example 1 is Ryanair or any other airline, I think this is actually a good idea from a practical sense as well as the terrorist angle. Even on the 12 hour flight to Mexico I take my mascara, eye liner and blemish stick with me on the plane so I can whip it out quickly when I get off and redo my eyeliner before meeting my Daniel who I haven’t seen for a week.
- Example 2 is the Olympic Games in London, I guess again for terrorist reasons. We get off the train in Coventry, hearded onto a bus, we’ve got our regulation sized Mexican flag and made sure we only bought our visa cards. Then we get to the stadium and you all crowd round a little table and have to empty everything out, we had our bag out, pockets, contents of our wallet and purse, loose in a clear plastic binbag, sealed with a special tape, until we passed security. Why, why why? Just so annoying that you have to empty everything out just to put it back in again ten meters down the path.
- Example 3 is now the Dallas Cowboys – Not just the Cowboys, but the whole NFL. I just think that for a family atmosphere it’s totally unreasonable and completely impractical.
I do come from the generation that smuggled vodka and coke into music festival arenas by just pouring it in the coke bottle and pretending it’s coke all along, and maybe I popped a spliff in my bra – it wasn’t for me but it was a convenient hiding place. Everywhere you go your bag is checked, museums, gigs, airports. There’s got to be a limit somewhere hasn’t there? Ok it’s only £6.50, but you are a four-person family going to watch the game and suddenly you can only use a plastic bag to put four sets of sandwiches, four sun-hats, four jackets, a tablet or two to follow other games on the internet, four bottles of coke, four items of supporter-wear (I’m thinking foam-finger, flag) and whatever tat you buy from the souvenir shop? And more often that not it’s going to be the woman that has to carry it, so all that let alone all the other crap women have in their bags.
Purse, house key, car key, clicker for carpark gate, security card for work, phone, hairband, suncream, bonjela, pen, chapstick, fan, details for my student loan in order to call them, shopping vouchers, weight watchers membership card, compact mirror, lipgloss, small purse for that time of the month, umbrella = 19 items, 20 including the receipt I threw away before taking the picture. Come on Football, remember your women!
Chilanga : Exported 